frogmom
September 26, 2005
Content (28/40)
Yours is the diary of a young, loving mother. I get the warm fuzzies
just a little as I pore over each day hemmed in by the pictures of
your family and yourself. This is not the most exciting or interesting
diary ever, but that's ok, because I get the feeling that you're
writing about what you really care about, what you really want to
write about. I can't ask you to force out more emotion or tell us more
about how you're feeling, because it seems to me that most days, your
diary is about recording the simple trials and triumphs of being a
mother and housewife. You are different from any other mother, but
your diary doesn't convey this. But how can I ask you to force
something exceptional which may or may not be within you? So I won't
ask that. I only have a tried truism for you: Do your best. That's
more than enough. Your diary is for you, always enjoy it.
I do still have several suggestions for you. You may take them or
break them as you please. These are things I think could improve and
heighten the interest of your diary. First, I think you should
proofread your entries before posting them. Your sentence structure is
a bit sketchy and hard to understand at times. I think if you just
read back through, you'd find the odd sentences and go, "Oh my! That
doesn't quite make sense…" I'm not asking for perfect grammar, I'm
just asking for a little more carefulness for coherence. Second, try
to avoid netspeak: LOL and OMG does not, in my opinion, add to or
enhance the emotion of your words. It only detracts. Third, avoid
posting forwards and net jokes. I caught far too many of those earlier
on, but I think you've quit posting so many. I just want to reiterate
that you should avoid them. Fourth and last, the pictures are one of
your high points. The pictures of your little girls are oh so
precious, the ones of other family members often seem rather
pointless; but altogether they seem a bit…drab. I think that you
should try to tell a little bit more story with each picture. Instead
of just posting all your pictures, and then having a mass of text
about your day, use lengthy captions with the pictures to tell the
story of your day. You can have a mass of text at the end still, just
try to incorporate the pictures with the events you so often speak of
separately. This should add more interest and relevance to your
pictures.
Layout (15/20)
I don't love this layout, but I think it suits you well enough. The
colors are decent, readable, and appropriate. The entry space is
rather too big for your pictures though...
Additionally, I think you need to downsize your links. You have a lot
to clutter things up. I think the best way to do this, would be to
first make a new page, and call it extras. Then, put every single
extra link on your main page except new, old, bio, designer, and host
link on this page. This includes your baby tracking devices and
weather banner. They don't need to be on the front page. Then you can
just make a new link to the extras page along with the aforementioned
links I told you not to move.
Navigation(14/15)
One point off for the cluttered multitude, but otherwise it's neat and easy.
Link(5/5)
Yep. Fairly easy to find.
Extras(7/10)
It seems like you have fewer extras than the first time I came around,
but that's just fine. The amount of extras you have is good and they
adequately cover all the main things a person would want to know about
you and the people you write about.
The photo interview is cute, but I think a lot of the pictures are a
tad too big. Most of them should probably be shrunk...
Contact(6/10)
Notes, Email, Comments.
Favorites:
None.
Total: 75/100
Reviewer: Megan